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As I reached for my plastic fork, I saw that it was resting on a little heart cut out of construction paper. Written on the heart were the words 'Jesu... loves you.' After my elegant Valentine's Day dinner of unidentifiable slop and carrot sticks, we had to sit there and listen to Alice preach for a while. I didn't know she was going to preach. She started just talking about how everyone's day had been and then she pointed me out and started talking about the story of the Good Samaritan and that. " Oh yeah, no, she's hot. Shit show though." I'll be sure not to tell her." I finished the beer and stood up to leave. I made a mock bow and left.I don't think he believed my story, but then again, neither did I really. In the thirty odd years I've graced the world with my presence, I've seen many things on television that constitute a new low, a new scrapping of the barrel, but this takes this piss. It makes Ghost Hunting with The Only Way is Essex seem avant guarde.The idea was simple: a. He was an US black man who claimed to be heterosexual. However, he also claimed to be attracted to reciprocal oral sex with men. Now, since he considered himself straight, he preferred to practice it in booths, in order to make it as impersonal as possible. Although he did not declare to have racial preferences all the adventures that he told occurred with whites. There was a detail of his descriptions that caught my attention: that he never talked about kissing other men, though he did not say. .. there're some things I haven't done yet; I don't want to screw up." What things?" I smiled reassuringly."I've never put ... put my mouth on a woman," she said shyly.I put my glass down and hugged her. "You don't have to," I said."I want to," she declared.Her cheek was on my shoulder, and I guess the nearness of my nipple infatuated her. She bent her head and took it into her mouth, sucking gently. It shrank rapidly into a hard, tingly knot, giving me a thrumming between my legs."Mmmmm," I.
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