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. no, it was nothing more than the realisation of how wretched mylife had been.It was simple before that week... I worked night shifts as a cleaner, g...thome, cracked a few beers as the sun rose, and lost myself in dreams of thebody I wanted. It was all simple, untill I took a weeks holiday. I didn'thave any reason to take it, but I needed to use my holiday sometime, so Ibooked it. Just after I'd booked it, I talked to a friend of mine, a trans-girl, who'd just moved south to go to university,. " Yes," agreed Fran. "It must have been awful for her. Rape must be every girl's worst nightmare. The thought of it is bad enough; I can't imagine what the reality would be like. So, Connie, I know you mean well but I don't think you should make light of it because you can't know how she felt unless you've suffered it yourself, can you?" Er —" began Connie, and paused.Alarmed, I gripped her by the arm and looked her straight in the eye. "Connie," I asked gravely, "have you been raped?" I'm not. The nearly 60-year-old lady who has delivered our meals for more than a month caught my stare. She was wearing a mask, so I have no idea what her face looked like but her frumpy appearance kept my attention. I wondered what kind of bra and panties she was wearing, and I wondered when the last time she got some dick was. Jesus Christ, I need to get my hormones under control. This was not an attractive woman but my hormones and need to nut was affecting the way I think. I snapped out of it and. So shallow. What if he comes? What will this girl do? I pressed my knees together, pressed my palms to my face and breathed deeply.Rat-tat-tat. The knock machine-gunned my senses. Rat-tat-tat. The second volley tore out my guts. ‘Miss?’The muffled voice pulled me to my feet. I tiptoed to the door, placed my palms and ear against it.Rat-tat-tat.I jumped backwards and fell onto the bed. The handle turned. The door inched open. An eye. A nose. A face. A smile. He took off his hat, placed it under.
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