I arrived at the club via cab, the cab driver kept leering at me in the mirror, I wasn’t into him, but I was flattered, as I know my body was rockin.... When I got there, I sat at the bar, it was an older crowd late 30’s to 50’s I would say, and here I am 18, and nervous as hell, everyone was nice, I even got hit on by a few guys, I mainly just sat there watching the baseball game on tv. Just as I was about to leave I hear a voice say ‘honey is this your first?’ First what I ask? ‘Dressing up?’. I was pretty shy and mostly kept to myself. I had a few friends, but I didn't spend much time outside school with them, as I was trying to keep my feelings secret. As I said, it started with an ad. I was home alone on a Friday and surfing the web. I was site hopping and ended up on the personal ads on Craigslist. I was reading through the m4m section when I came across an ad. It was from an older man from a neighboring town. He was looking for a younger, skinny guy to spend some time with. He. As I was taking care of myself, he rolled off the condom, pulled his pants up and zipped up. When I was finished, I finally took a good look around. I wanted to remember the place where I'd lost my virginity. That's when I asked him, "You bring a lot of girls here? I think the question surprised him because he shook his head and said, "No you're the first, I've just taken it to the beach or when I go fishing with the guys."I laughed and said, "Since I'm the first, am I supposed to autograph. I banged my head on the roof and fell on my backside. I looked up at the man who'd pulled me inside; he was built like a bouncer, all muscles covered barely by a tight black T-shirt. He smiled and pressed a finger against my lips to shush me, but I was too dazed by the bump to say anything.I shook my head groggily, and felt his body press against mine as he reached over to slide the doors shut.'Drive,' he said to the man behind the wheel.As the van pulled out he said, 'Ok, now listen, I'm not.
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" Physically," I admitted. "The need for physical closeness is still a part of being human. If you give up on that, then by God, you're really finishe
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